We all so want to feel good.
People smoke, drink, overeat, watch TV and take in tons of chemicals because they think it will make them feel good.
In this post, I'm going to talk about a simple method that can help you feel good even when everything in your life seems to be going wrong – without eating, drinking, watching TV, or going mad.
Gratitude is the key to feeling good when sad feelings overwhelm. (Src- Photobucket)
When life seems out of control, and nothing seems to work, don't smoke. Don't drink. Don't watch TV. Don't do anything to escape the situation.
Instead, try to be grateful.
That's the solution to feeling horrid that will give you an instant, amazing, good feeling.
By this point you might be thinking I am nuts. I mean, you're sad and dejected and I am asking you to be grateful? The height of artificiality, eh?
But it works. If you do it genuinely, the right way. If you can be grateful for anything in your life for 1 second, even when you are depressed, your sadness will go away. Everything that is troubling you will vanish and you will instantly feel so good, you won't understand what's happened.
Yes, this requires a bit of effort, but don't you take bitter medicine when you are ill because it'll make you get better? This isn't half as tough. Here's step 1:
|￼Ask yourself – what is one thing that you are truly grateful for, today.|
This step is the most important step. Don't move ahead until you've finished this one. What is it that you are truly grateful for right now?
Now initially, nothing will strike you. In fact thoughts like “Are you kidding me? Nothing at all.” will come up. Let them be, but don't give up. Keep going. Keep asking yourself till something you are really grateful about strikes you. It'll take some effort, but I promise it'll be worth it.
Once you've racked your brains for around 5 minutes, you will start getting some ideas. The fact that your wife put in that extra effort for you in the morning. The fact that you do have a kid who's fine. The fact that you_________ . Or maybe some other things. But don't take my word for 'what' you are grateful for. Let thoughts which genuinely make you feel grateful for something pop up. You will definitely get atleast one genuine thought of gratitude towards something or someone as you keep going and try to think of something.
Make sure this thing is something you are truly grateful for. No lip service. If it takes 10 minutes to find such a thing, take 10 minutes.
Once you actually find something you are truly grateful to have in your life, acknowledge to yourself how grateful you are for this thing. As you do so, you'll feel a sudden rush (yes. A rush) of good feelings sweep through you. You'll immediately feel better.
Once you've started feeling a bit better as you think of that one thing you truly are grateful for, go on to the next step – think of one more thing you are grateful for.
This time, it won't be that tough. Within a few seconds, you'll be able to think of one more thing that you're truly grateful for. Feel that feeling and acknowledge that gratitude.
Now move on to the next step which is...(yup!) think – of one more thing you are truly grateful for. Then another one. Then yet another. Keep going and keep thinking of more things you are genuinely grateful for. You will now see thoughts about things you are grateful for flooding you. You will keep remembering more and more things you are truly grateful for, and before you know, they will rush at you.
And as they rush, you will feel a deeper peace coming in. Slowly, relief will set in as your sadness will vanish for some time and you will feel good.
It will. It will take hard work to think about that first thing you are truly grateful for. But if you can persist till then, it will work.
This is the age in history when we actually have everything our ancestors never even dreamt off. Imagine one of our ancestors in the year 1000 AD. What if we told him he could talk to anyone across the oceans? What if he were told he could carry a device in his pocket and be accessible anywhere? What if he could type in anything into this device and gain information about anything on this earth and even watch movies in here? He would be so grateful, he would be moved to tears for a while.
Now I am not saying you and me are bad people because we aren't grateful for these things. What I am saying is – that there is a lot of nice stuff in the world, we can truly be grateful for – and our sadness is mostly a matter of perspective rather than something out there being really that bad.
And that is why, when you make that effort and find out even one thing you are truly grateful for, you feel good. Because you start putting daily happenings in perspective and don't make them out to be huge monsters.
Being grateful is not everything, but it is a BIG chunk of taking away the problem.
Once you are genuinely grateful and you are feeling good, now you are powerful. Now you won't feel like the victim anymore. You will feel a burst of energy inside you. And so now, you can tackle any problem you have head on.
You got sacked at work? Now, you will have the power to figure out ways to apply for a new job or start a new life.
You have a relationship problem? Now, once you are truly grateful for something and are feeling good, you can figure out what you can do to either make the relationship better or leave.
Gratitude doesn't solve your problems but it makes you powerful and happier by giving you perspective. Then, your big boulders become pebbles and you can deal with them easily.
You don't even need to be flooded with sad feelings to try out the “feeling good” boost that gratitude provides (it can put chocolate to shame :P ).
Right now, think of one thing you are truly grateful for. Don't “try” to be grateful for anything – keep thinking and keep going till you feel that genuine gratitude with respect anything in your life. When you get that one thing, think of another thing you are genuinely grateful for. Keep going. Soon, you might be smiling.
Have a rocking day!