As you know, my online home is
My intention as I send this newsletter is to tell you one thing that changed me for the better in the last one month. Then I will ask you to do one small and interesting thing that'll improve your life in a small way TODAY.
So, shall we begin?
One Interesting Thing I Did In the Last 1 Month
Since a long time, I had held a grudge against a person X. This person X (let's assume X is male) didn't do anything really nasty. He didn't attack me physically or he didn't try to strangle me. But in some sense, I felt betrayed by X. I had been very intimate with X and I had expected him to stand by me, and support me and help me be happier. However, X did not live up to my expectations. I expected him to be a hero and he in my eyes, he turned out to be a chimp.
The point is, until 3 weeks ago, I held on to my grudge against X. If X was mentioned somewhere, I would immediately remember the things he did and the things he did not do which "he could have done." Sometimes, when nothing else was on my mind, I would think "what a pathetic person this X is!" At other times, I wouldn't even realize that while I was going on with my daily chores, I would sub-consciously be criticizing X.
Then 3 weeks ago, things changed. One evening, I realized that while I was blaming X day in and day out, I was actually "keeping that resentment, anguish, pain and anger" alive in my heart. I was making sure that the grudge "lived" inside me and flourished. I was feeding it every day. And I didn't know whether X was affected by it or not, but that grudge was killing me and weakening me, myself everyday because I was filling my life with anger instead of happiness.
As soon as this thought struck me, I thought: till when will I hold this anger inside me? Till when, will I keep stuffing myself with this resentment? Forever, throughout my life? That's when I realized I had to let go of this grudge. I had to do something that could take this bad stuff out of my system.
I thought, "Why did X do what he did?" For the first time ever, I tried to look at things from X's point of view and see why he could have betrayed me. I really tried to peep into his heart. That's when I realized that "X never intended to hurt me." I realized that X didn't meet my expectations, but he didn't meet them because at his level of living he just couldn't meet them. The way he was, was the way he was. If he didn't do something for me, that was because he didn't feel like doing it. He did the best he could in that moment - just that his best wasn't enough for me. He never intentionally thought, "let me go ahead and cause Meghu a lot of pain." In fact, he never intended pain for me. But his actions simply reflected the kind of person he was - irrespective of whether he met my expectations or not. He was just being himself all the time while I was blaming him and saying "why are you being yourself?"
When I thought these things over, I realized 2 things. Firstly, X had never intended to hurt me and that he had just been himself. His being himself had hurt me. Secondly, it was over. I didn't need to keep seething with anger when what had happened in the past was over. I need not be best buddies with X any more because he and I are not compatible, but I can let go of the past and be happy.
As the night came up, I felt a certain calm descend on me. I felt so much more peaceful, so much better. In the last 3 weeks, I have been able to think about X and smile. I have remembered the two points I have mentioned above and felt glad that I have forgiven him.
It seems like a load has been lifted from my head. I feel light. :)
What is the One Interesting Thing You Can Do Today?
Is there someone you hate? Someone you resent from the bottom of your heart?
Lie down on your bed, close your eyes and ask yourself - "Did this person really intend to hurt me? Did this person really want to make me suffer? If not, then why did she do what she did? She did not meet my expectations but was that because her level of being or level of existence was such that she could not understand those expectations? Maybe she just wasn't capable of meeting my expectations, being the person she was?"
The point is - there is no point holding on to a grudge that scars you, yourself. That grudge is taking away happiness from you because even when you are happy, deep down that resentment still exists and limits your happiness.
It may take an hour, or two or three. But could you close your eyes - talk to yourself - and forgive that person today? Not for her sake, but for your own?
Release her from your system. That could be one thing you could do today.
Yes, yes I am on Twitter and Facebook
I mostly tweet or post whatever I am thinking in that moment. I might be thinking about why carrots are red, or about the law of attraction or about my efforts to listen more and speak less. :)
Sometimes I also post quotes that stun me or links to articles I love.
The Meditation Experiment
Recently, I began a Meditation Experiment at personal-development-is-fun.com.
Here's the first post related to the experiment.
Basically, I intend to meditate everyday, for 30 days, to see what effects meditation can have on my life. And I intend to post my experiences every week or so on PDIF.
So, well, let's see how the experiment goes!
That's about it for now.
Until next time please keep rocking.
Hoping you have a peaceful day,
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